What do you do when your child Ignores you?
For example, when you ask your child a question like, "What would you like for breakfast?" Or you are giving a direction, "You need to eat your oatmeal at the table."
I know better than to take it personally, but it drives me insane to be ignored. And yes, I realize that is MY problem AND I am asking for help. What have you done?
PS: My daughter has answered open-ended questions about what she wants for a meal for a very long time, so it doesn't seem to be a developmental issue for her.
^_^:
I'll go over to DS or DD, lay a hand gently on their shoulder and ask again. Touching them seems to help them focus on what I'm saying.
^_^:
:yeah:
I also sometimes just go and get in front of ds and make eye contact. I think (at least in my ds's case) he's often just concentrating hard. Sometimes it's because I'm saying something he doesn't want to hear or is too hyped up to listen to, and then I really do find making physical contact (holding his hand or gently putting my hand on his cheek as I repeat what I said, as well as asking him to look at my face) is important.
^_^:
Someone here at MDC mentioned saying something like, "What color is your shirt?" when their DC was ignoring them to see if they really didn't hear her or just weren't answering a particular question. I tried it with my DS the next time he was ignoring me and sure enough, like with the other mama, my DS got a confused look on his face and said, "...Green..." I said, "Oh, your ears *are* working! Now, do you want oatmeal or waffles for breakfast?" :lol
Most of the time, though I just say, "Honey, mama asked you a question -- please answer me" and he usually does.
^_^:
I try not to assume that they're "ignoring" me. Ignoring implies intent. Instead I assume that they just plain didn't hear me or didn't register what I said. I myself do that all the time when people talk to me! My mind is just in another place. Giving my kids the benefit of the doubt and assuming that's what's going on with them goes a long way toward avoiding frustration on my part. :)
So, if they don't seem to have heard what I said, I might...
- repeat
- move closer to them and touch them
- make eye contact
- let them know what kind of a response I'm looking for
- wait until they're not preoccupied if it's a non-urgent conversation
I try not to make sarcastic comments or get pissy with them.
^_^:
I try not to assume that they're "ignoring" me. Ignoring implies intent. Instead I assume that they just plain didn't hear me or didn't register what I said. I myself do that all the time when people talk to me! My mind is just in another place. Giving my kids the benefit of the doubt and assuming that's what's going on with them goes a long way toward avoiding frustration on my part. :)
So, if they don't seem to have heard what I said, I might...
- repeat
- move closer to them and touch them
- make eye contact
- let them know what kind of a response I'm looking for
- wait until they're not preoccupied if it's a non-urgent conversation
I try not to make sarcastic comments or get pissy with them. :yeah: I wouldn't want anyone getting all upset with me cuz I was preoccupied.
^_^:
All of the above, and if its an older child I will say, "Can I please have your attention," Or "Can I please have a response?" Or "I feel like you are ignoring me."
More Topical:
I know better than to take it personally, but it drives me insane to be ignored. And yes, I realize that is MY problem AND I am asking for help. What have you done?
PS: My daughter has answered open-ended questions about what she wants for a meal for a very long time, so it doesn't seem to be a developmental issue for her.
^_^:
I'll go over to DS or DD, lay a hand gently on their shoulder and ask again. Touching them seems to help them focus on what I'm saying.
^_^:
:yeah:
I also sometimes just go and get in front of ds and make eye contact. I think (at least in my ds's case) he's often just concentrating hard. Sometimes it's because I'm saying something he doesn't want to hear or is too hyped up to listen to, and then I really do find making physical contact (holding his hand or gently putting my hand on his cheek as I repeat what I said, as well as asking him to look at my face) is important.
^_^:
Someone here at MDC mentioned saying something like, "What color is your shirt?" when their DC was ignoring them to see if they really didn't hear her or just weren't answering a particular question. I tried it with my DS the next time he was ignoring me and sure enough, like with the other mama, my DS got a confused look on his face and said, "...Green..." I said, "Oh, your ears *are* working! Now, do you want oatmeal or waffles for breakfast?" :lol
Most of the time, though I just say, "Honey, mama asked you a question -- please answer me" and he usually does.
^_^:
I try not to assume that they're "ignoring" me. Ignoring implies intent. Instead I assume that they just plain didn't hear me or didn't register what I said. I myself do that all the time when people talk to me! My mind is just in another place. Giving my kids the benefit of the doubt and assuming that's what's going on with them goes a long way toward avoiding frustration on my part. :)
So, if they don't seem to have heard what I said, I might...
- repeat
- move closer to them and touch them
- make eye contact
- let them know what kind of a response I'm looking for
- wait until they're not preoccupied if it's a non-urgent conversation
I try not to make sarcastic comments or get pissy with them.
^_^:
I try not to assume that they're "ignoring" me. Ignoring implies intent. Instead I assume that they just plain didn't hear me or didn't register what I said. I myself do that all the time when people talk to me! My mind is just in another place. Giving my kids the benefit of the doubt and assuming that's what's going on with them goes a long way toward avoiding frustration on my part. :)
So, if they don't seem to have heard what I said, I might...
- repeat
- move closer to them and touch them
- make eye contact
- let them know what kind of a response I'm looking for
- wait until they're not preoccupied if it's a non-urgent conversation
I try not to make sarcastic comments or get pissy with them. :yeah: I wouldn't want anyone getting all upset with me cuz I was preoccupied.
^_^:
All of the above, and if its an older child I will say, "Can I please have your attention," Or "Can I please have a response?" Or "I feel like you are ignoring me."
More Topical: